Everything You Need to Know About Surrogacy for Gay Men
History of Gay Surrogacy
After the first successful gestational surrogacy attempt in 1985, intended parents were able to choose an egg donor and a surrogate to have children. Growing Generations was founded in 1996 with a specific focus on helping gay men become parents. Our founders were frustrated with the many agencies turning away gay men as well as the number of agencies and other professionals who were not equipped to guide them through the unique issues faced by gay intended fathers. Those issues included:
- Navigating and changing legal systems that were designed to accommodate only “Mom and Dad”
- Educating and recruiting surrogates and egg donors excited to help gay men become dads
- Helping our dads talk to their kids about surrogacy
- Helping our dads talk about surrogacy to their support networks
- Educating doctors and other professionals about gay parenting
- Helping our gay dads decide if one or both want to provide sperm to create embryos
- Creating solutions for HIV positive men to become biological fathers via surrogacy
Gay Surrogacy Now
We’re happy to report that much has changed since the nineties, and we don’t face many of the complications we once did. Growing Generations was there from the beginning, helping pave the way for hundreds of gay men to create their families through our surrogacy program. Here are the topics our gay intended dads are most curious about:
Can you help us find an Egg Donor?
Yes! Growing Generations has an extensive egg donor program. We have egg donors from various backgrounds. We encourage you to view our donors and let them speak for themselves.
What if I have a friend of family member who has offered to donate eggs?
We’ve helped many families with a “known” egg donor. We’re happy to connect with your chosen donor, walk her through what to expect, and help coordinate each step of her screening and egg retrieval process.
How will you match me with a Surrogate?
At Growing Generations, the entire surrogacy program often lasts from 15 to 20 months, but it starts with you completing a short online profile so we can match you with the ideal surrogate.
In order to ensure our matching process is successful, our surrogates undergo an intensive screening process that includes an extensive application, interviews, a criminal background check, psychological evaluations, and a medical examination by an in vitro fertilization specialist. The medical exam includes drug, nicotine, and infectious disease screenings.
What happens after surrogate matching?
Once your surrogate is chosen and you are ready to move forward, we will notify your IVF doctor’s office that it’s time to try for pregnancy. If you are not yet working with an IVF clinic, we are happy to refer you to one within our network. Benefits you can expect include:
- Experienced medical professionals for screenings, egg retrievals and embryo transfers
- Using sperm from both male partners (if applicable) to have siblings from the same egg donor
- Selecting which of your embryos is implanted into your surrogate
- The ability for HIV-positive males to use their own sperm to become biological fathers
Is surrogacy legally safe for gay men?
Each state has laws regulating surrogacy, and some do not grant parental rights for same-sex couples. Other states do not allow or recognize surrogacy contracts at all. This is why we partner with International Reproductive Law Group for expert guidance and legal counsel. They offer:
- 100% success rate in getting you named as the legal parent(s) of your child(ren)
- Counsel on which states are surrogate-friendly and ideal for your situation
- Assistance obtaining paternity judgments that name you as the legal parent of your child with both parents’ names on the birth certificate – or just one name if you are single
- Legal representation and assistance drafting your surrogate and/or egg donor contracts and family planning documents