The Egg Donor Matching Process

It’s the moment that becoming an egg donor starts to feel real. Matching with your intended parents will indicate the official start of your donation journey. Often times you will not be aware that your profile is being considered until you receive an Email from us alerting you that intended parents have indicated that they’d like to work with you. Here’s a look at what’s happening behind the scenes while you wait for that phone call.

Once you are published to our searchable online database, hundreds of intended parents will have access to view your videos, photos, and information. Some donors will be chosen rather quickly, sometimes in a matter of hours to days, while other donors will have a much longer time between online publication and selection. We encourage you to not see this as any indicator of your desirability as a donor. We also encourage you to not wait by the computer for that email. Understand that parents are seeking very specific traits in their donor, and it can take a while for them to find them all in a single person. This means that your path to a match can be very brief, to very lengthy as we wait for intended parents to be seeking your unique combination of attributes. Our goal is not for you to have to plan your life around waiting to be selected.

Once you do get that exciting email from us, we will ask you to provide your upcoming blackout dates. Blackout dates are dates that you’re unable to travel for procedures. The entire donation process hinges on these dates, so we’re happy to plan around what does and does not work for your schedule. Behind the scenes, a case specialist is already preparing to talk with the intended parents about these dates and produce a calendar of events that will work for everyone.

Once the intended parents approve of your schedule, you will get to meet the case specialist who will guide you through the remainder of your process. There will be additional screenings to be completed, and eventually, you’ll also go through the legal paperwork. Once your legal contracts are signed and your calendar is approved you will be cleared to start the journey.

It’s important to respond to communication with Growing Generations staff promptly. The entire process starts with your availability and hinges on timely completion of tasks. This includes medical appointments once they are scheduled.

While you won’t be told who has chosen you or why, know that intended parents don’t choose their donor lightly. You were chosen for a specific reason and these parents are very excited to work with you. Congratulations on being chosen, and thank you for deciding to help change the world for this family.

Dr. Kim Bergman

Kim Bergman, PhD, a licensed psychologist of 22 years, has specialized in the area of gay and lesbian parenting, parenting by choice and third party assisted reproduction for the last two decades. Dr. Bergman has created a comprehensive psychological screening, support and monitoring process for Intended Parents, Surrogates and Donors. She is the co-owner of Fertility Counseling Services and Growing Generations and is a member of the American Society of Reproductive Medicine, the American Fertility Association, the American Psychological Association, the Los Angeles County Psychological Association, the Lesbian and Gay Psychotherapy Association, and the Gay and Lesbian Medical Association. She is on the national board of the Family Equality Council. Dr. Bergman writes, teaches and speaks extensively on parenting by choice. Along with co-authors, she published “Gay Men Who Become Fathers via Surrogacy: The Transition to Parenthood” (Journal of GLBT Family Studies, April 2010). Dr. Bergman created her own family using third party assisted reproduction and she lives with her wife of 28 years and their two teenage daughters.